Getting caught up

After my last blog, I got a call from the RE saying that my HCG beta was positive and that I was pregnant. He said that for the level it was at that the pregnancy was at least from my previous menstrual cycle. I had no clue! I was on the pill for crying out loud!

I went in the next day for more blood work and u/s. There was nothing in my uterus (of course!) and they found a large mass in my right tube. Here we go again! So, the doctor said that the tube would need to be removed. He said that my chances were extremely high for having another ectopic pregnancy, so we could remove my right tube only or remove both of them. Being that we are doing IVF, he recommended removing them both to increase our chances of success.

My appointment was at 9:00 in the morning. By 12:30 that afternoon, I was in the ER at HCHC. I waited around in the ER until 4:30 PM. They finally admitted me and took me to a private suite until the surgery. C and I watched TV until it was time to go to the OR. The surgery was at 10:00 at night. I was beyond exhausted.

Overall, the surgery went well. I now have zero tubes which makes me feel slightly less than a woman. Woman tie their tubes all the time, but they make that choice after having the kids they want. I am now severly infertile and have to relie on IVF to have anymore biological children. After all I have been through, I don't want to do IVF anymore, but I feel like all that I have been through will be for not. Maybe time will change how I feel. I feel like as long as I am in this TTC game, the longer I will have this weight on my shoulders. If I get out now, will it or will it not help me move on from this.

We are teed up to do IVF in April. If it will actually happen or not, I'm not sure yet.....